Our Friend Paul
Below is Paul's Eulogy written and spoken by his brother Matt at his Funeral
Forgive me if I’m a little
upset about this – nobody wants to deliver a Eulogy for his kid brother – its
not supposed to work like that.
Having said that, I am
happy to talk about Paul, he was a very smart guy with an immense heart and many
talents.
He knew how to make friends
and hold them for life. He would do
anything for his friends. If you were a
friend of Paul’s you were lucky.
You might ask what exactly did he do to make his friends so happy?
Paul could fix anything.
He was a good carpenter, electrician, car mechanic, home remodeler,
plumber, welder, you name it, he could do just about anything with his hands.
And, he would do it at a reasonable cost with repeated trips to Home
Depot or Sears to get just the right parts.
He had a tool collection that would make most hardware stores envious.
He worked on Wall Street
and was a Bond Trader for a while after he got out of Stony Brook.
He did that for about 14 years.
I remember him saying that Bond trading with muti-million dollar accounts
really excited him. He was really
good at it, too. It was a glamorous
time for him, wearing $400 suits every day and spending a lot of time in fancy
restaurants afterwards. And
man, could Paul network – he would hang out and shoot the breeze with everybody.
The friends he made there were still his friends up until Tuesday when he
died. He also found time to manage
the Pershing company bowling league and later on, a Women’s softball team.
He spent over 24 years with
the love of his life, Stacy. Despite
disagreements about what constituted “taking good care of his health” they got
along famously. It was always a
pleasure to have Paul and Stacy over our house in New Jersey for the holidays.
Stacy was always friendly, polite and quiet while Paul went into his
Santa Claus routine. Paul was GREAT
to his nieces, his nephew and his friend’s kids.
In my family he showered my girls with really cool interesting presents
that would put big smiles on their faces.
It was almost embarrassing to Lucy and I because the stuff Paul and Stacy
gave them was always more fun than our sensible gifts.
Paul loved his nieces and he always
hugged them and let them know.
Paul’s next great love was
cooking. After his bond trading
days he went to the French Culinary Institute in New York to fine tune his
cooking skills. I think he must have majored in Bar-B-Queing because he really
excelled at that in the ensuing years.
Paul could prepare a meal in the great outdoors that would blow your
mind. His cooking would add another
whole level of excellence to any event, whether it was a friend’s confirmation,
graduation, wedding, or just a Giant’s party.
He could prepare steaks, hamburgers and salads that would make you think
you were eating in a world famous restaurant, even though you were just at a
friend’s graduation party. He spent
many years cooking for his buddies watching the Giant’s games in Moe’s shed.
He really had a talent for cooking and he enjoyed sharing that with
people and making them happy.
Paul always had a boom box
going full blast at his outdoor feasts.
He loved music from the 60s and 70s like the Grateful Dead, John Prine,
The Band, Bob Dylan, John Fogerty, Levon Helm, Mark Knopfler, Neil Young, you
get the picture. As far as Paul was
concerned, that was real music. He was
always sharing copies of cds with me.
Growing up a few years ahead of him, I agreed with his choices, and I was
happy to get the free cds to load on my Ipod.
One of his oldest friends,
Ivy, came in with a few funny stories about Paul during his college days.
He discovered the wonders of recycling beer cans for the 5 cent deposit.
He would neatly put the empty cans back into the plastic holder that held
the six packs together, and slide them on a broomstick one six pack at a time
until the broomstick was filled up.
Then he would go marching back to the store carrying the stack of empty
six packs on a stick to get his deposits back.
The store owner was a little confused at first with Paul’s technique, but
realized after a while how incredibly efficient it was.
Another story related to
her sister Vic’s birthday party at McDonald’s for a bunch of 6 to 8 year old
kids. Paul volunteered to make an
appearance at the party as a clown, and he was a big hit with the kids, except
for one named Lenny. Lenny decided
to pull the red nose off Paul’s face, fill it with soda and stick it back on.
Paul remained calm, and finished up his clown duties as if nothing had
happened. A true testament to his
patience.
Paul spread much love and
happiness using his talents, and that was his mission in life, but he had one
dream for himself that he didn’t see fulfilled.
He wanted to buy that great big house he and Stacy lived in on
Westminster Road. He waited
patiently for the Doc or her family to sell it to him.
As the years went by I tried to talk him out of waiting and encouraged
him to buy something else in Brooklyn, but he wouldn’t hear of it.
Unfortunately, the opportunity never came.
Otherwise Paul did
everything he wanted to do, and we here today are much better off that some of
his favorite things to do were sharing his talents and making his friends and
loved ones happy.